親愛的許爸, 今天晚上在和上千位華人一起聽完中港台澳, 海外華人五胞胎父老對您的尊榮和愛之後, 終於有勇氣來紀念您, 影響我生命的屬靈父親…
記得十一年前, 當東岸的牧者辦完一年一次的聯合復興特會, 聚在您家客廳檢討時, 牧者們一致感覺不能再每年做一次復興特會… 雖然人們似乎有極大與神會遇的經歷, 卻復興卻無法持續, 一再循環. 在一開始的討論中, 很多有名的的講員被列在可以被邀請的名單中, 但卻沒有一個名字有神同在的重量, 直到您開始分享您前一年參加回家的經歷… 當您開始描述在沒有講員的聚會中, 上千人, 包括小孩子, 一起在神同在中降伏, 安靜超過45分鐘, 那種對神本身極大的渴慕撥動了所有在場的人的心, 神似乎走進了您的客廳… 不是為了任何的講員, 而是神祂自己. 從那時候開始, 東岸的牧者因著您的帶領, 開始進入了這個”沒完沒了"的家人同行旅程, 為要建立一個在地如在天的家. 十多年走下來, 我們都在不完全當中跌跌撞撞成長, 發現神的心意和任務, 但這真的是一個, 像您總是說的, “很值得” 的旅程.
從2010年您家客廳, 一小群人為這異象討論和禱告, 到2011年第一次在東岸的回家聚集, 初熟的果子 (https://get.google.com/.../AF1QipNVvTNSlfgHxP5mnIJg4...); 近幾年開始您帶著東岸的華人開始成為美國原住民安全的家 (他們愛您, 給了您好可愛的名字: 山酋長!!) 家成型到一個程度, 美國原住民領袖Joe在他的假期, 帶著他全家選擇到您(不在觀光區)的家度假.. 從 2020年疫情開始, 東岸的家人每週一到五晚上, 每天在zoom平台上, 天父的客廳中在一起隨性聊天, 分享, 敬拜, 禱告. 我最喜歡的是您每次上線就會告訴我們, 這是第幾個星期我們在一起啦.. 還有您對年輕人的鼓勵, 當我們帶敬拜時, 您總是很認真的投入, 您的鏡頭和聲音一定都開著, 甚至音樂結束之後, 還會聽到您在線的另外一端哼哼唱唱… 很想念您常常帶我們唱我們聽都沒聽過的古老詩歌, 並且分享您領受的啟示, 雖然我只有從一半加入天父的客廳, 但這段時間大約是最自然, 最棒的生命傳承~
過去的一年, 常常跟您說, 好喜歡您成為眼睛都會笑的許爸! 您不再”講道”, 但您的生命充滿了道. 吸引我到一個地步, 就覺得一定要到您跟前, 聽您說什麼都好.. 謝謝您在花草書法中活出神的喜樂, 成為生命的榜樣; 謝謝您把神國深奧的事用淺顯的方式寫在家書中, 並讓列國的家人有了文字可以描述靈裡深處的渴望.. 謝謝您勇敢, 謙卑地追隨神, 讓我們有見證可以跟隨.
今晚找出來2010年第一封關於東岸回家的email, 是您派我像探子一樣, 以行政的角度去溫哥華看看回家到底在做什麼, 東岸可以怎麼操作的信. “My heart is for unity between/among Charismatic & non-charismatic, Taiwanese & mainlanders' churches, two generations, and even Chines as the bridge for sons of Isaac & Ishmael.” 您對合一和家的異象從一開始就是如此的清楚和火熱, 或許這是這十年您如何可以如此”瘋狂”地徹底轉換, 把東岸的教會關係轉換成一個家… 在您回天家前兩天, 跟您聊您的最後一封家書, 您說 “我了解的是相當profound的, 從自己有限的經驗來的, 是my treasure, 但仍只是膚淺的一點看見, 有感而發吧了. 神太大了!” 許爸爸, 這十多年下來, 您沒有建立人眼所能見的數字, 大教會, 但您將教會變為家的影響, 大約只有在天上才能衡量吧! 好想念您, 但我知道好愛好愛耶穌的您, 去了您最愛, 最想去的地方, 加入雲彩般的見證人, 為我們能繼續使命加油! 我們會接著您的棒子努力的…您的夢想, 也是神的夢想: “一生無大志, 只求教會是個家”!
Dear Papa Fred, tonight, after listening to the zoom gathering, where over 1000 people from the Chinese quintuplets in Taiwan, China, Hong Kong, Macau and overseas together shared our honor and love for you, I finally had the courage to write about my own memories about you, the spiritual father who have influenced my life...
Eleven years ago, when a group of East Coast Chinese pastors gathered in your living room to debrief for the annual regional conference, there was a unified sense that we no longer want to do the annual revival conferences.. Although people seemed to have great encounters with God during the conferences, it seemed challenging to continue the revival for the rest of the year. It’s always the same cycle you were seeing. At the beginning of the discussion, we listed down many famous speakers that we could invite for the following year, but there was no weight of God’s presence on any of them, until you began to share your homecoming gathering experience just a year before... When you began to describe how in a meeting without designated speakers, thousands of people, including children, surrendered together in God's presence, worshipping in silence for over 45 minutes, it felt like God walked into your living room. That great longing for God Himself touched the hearts of all who were there... not for any speaker, but people gathered for God Himself, what on His heart. Since that time, under your leadership, those few East Coast pastors have been launched into this "unending” journey of family walking together, to build a true family that is on earth as it is in heaven. For over a decade, we have stumbled through many mistakes, discovering God's heart and assignments along the way, but it has truly been, as you always say, a very worthwhile journey.
It started with a small group of people in your living room in 2010, discussing and praying over the vision, and there was the first homecoming gathering in NYC in 2011, the first fruits of the vision (https://get.google.com/.../AF1QipNVvTNSlfgHxP5mnIJg4...)….. Recent years, you brought east coast family to become a safe home for Native American brothers and sister (they loved you so much and even gave you a lovely name: Mountain Chief!) This spiritual family has been established to an extent that Joe, the Native American leader, chose to bring his family to your home (not in the tourist area) on his vacation.. that says a lot about the relationships! From the beginning of the pandemic in 2020, the East Coast family started to meet every Monday through Friday night on the zoom, “Father's living room”, for casual conversation, sharing hearts, worship, and prayers. What I love the most is that every time you came online, you will tell us how many weeks we've been meeting on zoom together.. I think it was way over 80 weeks last time you counted. And I love your encouragement to the young people! When we would lead worship, you were always very present, your camera and audio were always on, and even after the music ended, you would continue humming on the other end of the line, joyfully enjoyed the Lord and us... I miss how you led us sing old hymns that we had never heard before, and shared your deep revelation with us. Even though I only joined half of the zoom calls, this period of time is probably the best life impartation I’ve received.
Over the past year, I have often told you that I love how you have become Papa Fred whose eyes can even smile! You don't "preach" anymore, but your life is full of the Word. I was drawn to a point where I felt I had to come to your presence and listen to whatever you had to say. anything... Thank you for showing us how to live a joyful Christian through your love for plants, flowers, calligraphy, your family, and people; thank you for translating the deep things of God's kingdom in your “letters from home”, giving words to even the global body to describe the longing in many of us. Thank you for courageously and humbly pursuing God, so that we can have a testimony to follow.
Tonight I found the first email you wrote in 2010 related to east coast family journey, sending me to Vancouver to “spy out” from an administrative perspective what family journey is all about and how it can work with our group at east. "My heart is for unity between/among Charismatic & non-charismatic, Taiwanese & mainlanders' churches, two generations, and even Chines as the bridge for sons of Isaac & Ishmael”. Your vision for unity and family has been so clear and fiery from the beginning. Perhaps that is how you have been able to make such a radical shift transforming the East Coast Chinese churches into a family. Two days before you returned to your heavenly home, I was texting you about your last letter from home, and you said, "What I discovered is quite profound, from my own limited experience. It is my treasure, but it is still only a superficial glimpse, just the sharing from my heart. God is too big!" Dear Papa Fred, for more than a decade, you have not built a big church as far as the eye can see, but the influence you have had in making Chinese churches become a family can only be measured in heaven! I miss you so much, but I know that you, who loved Jesus so much, went to the place you always loved and wanted to go the most, joining the cloud of witnesses, to cheer us on in our mission! We will take the baton and continue running for your dream, also God's dream: "I have no great ambition in life, but to make the Church a family"!
Jenny, thanks for sharing in such detail the beginnings of this journey! You have a gifted memory and you really have an ability to understand, focus in on, what's on the Father's heart.